My mom used to buy a new dress, hang it in the closet for 3 weeks. Wear it. And when dad asked, “Is that a new dress?” she replied, “No, I’ve had it for awhile” winking at me. Of course, this was the extent of my mother’s manipulation of dad. She really didn’t need his permission to purchase what she wanted.
Yes, women can be manipulative. We use manipulation as a tool to get ahead, get what we need, to be heard and to persuade. Manipulation is used when other tools are not available to us. The manipulative woman can be your sister, your friend, your mother, your daughter or your mother-in-law.
Women like to think that other women are [Read More]
At the International Coach Federation Conference in Orlando, Florida, keynote speaker and best selling author Peter Block said, “Community is the structure of belonging.” Then he followed it with, “We need the feminine in the workplace.”
What? I did a double take. I (and every woman reading this post) have known this for 30 years -it becomes ‘enlightening’ news because it is coming from Peter Block?
Thank you, Peter. I admire your courage for saying it, and, more importantly, meaning it.
I agree with everything Peter said – in fact, I agreed with it 30 years ago!
But is this revelation coming too late? [Read More]
I could really use some input on today’s blog post- can you please help me out?
Do you ever feel like you have to ask permission for everything in life? [Read More]
Yesterday, Joseph Stack flew his plane into the IRS building in Austin, Texas. The scene was dreadful and frightening. As of this writing two people have died. A senseless action.
What influenced this man to carry out such a horrendous act? Is the IRS a powerful influence over a person’s decision to become violent? Or was the influence that existed taken in such a way that hopelessness was the only result.
What occurred inside this seemingly sane person that caused him to burn his home then do a kamikaze? The answer my friends is simple…
Emotions.
In my blog, How I Conquer the 3 Biggest Barriers to Influence, I revealed the 3 psychological emotions that stand in your way of having influence over yourself.
When we allow an outside force, person or organization to influence our good judgment we must take action as to WHO and WHAT influences our lives.
My heart hurts for his family and I send my most sincere condolences. As a professional, a licensed psychologist and one who has counseled many – I’d like to talk about influence and how it affects a woman’s life everyday.
The Danger of Hopelessness and Desperation
Hopelessness is having no expectation of success - believing there is no solution. It threatens our physical and psychological well being. It is an “end” emotion meaning there is no possible change.
Desperation is defined as ‘recklessness arising from despair.’ Desperation blinds us to a sense of self preservation – unable to think clearly about our behavior. In massive quantities, we become influenced by the deep wallows of despair and hopelessness.
These two emotions must be influenced by our own inner truth and value. As women especially WE must influence these two emotions when they arise. Trust me, they will arise… and the truth of how valuable you are and the reality of hope must be at the core of your existence.
Why is this important to know? [Read More]
