Influence: Become ‘One With It’

by Karen Keller, Ph.D.

To truly influence and maximize the power within your grasp, you need to become “one with it.” Huh? Let me tell you a story.

A few years ago, I took an off ramp, circling around to a huge overpass when I hit black ice. Now, most of you reading who live where there’s snow understand what black ice is. It’s ice that is basically invisible.

Well, I hit this invisible ice going about 60 mph when my SUV fish-tailed almost to a 90 degree angle with the road. Going over the side of the road wasn’t an option since it was a 150 foot drop. Cars slowed down and dropped way back behind me. My arms were suddenly sore, even numb, from maneuvering the steering wheel back and forth to keep from rolling the truck.

Then it hit me. I needed to become “one” with the truck. I let myself relax, breathe, and feel the sway and momentum of the vehicle. I moved with it instead of against it. All of a sudden, it became controllable. I was keeping it on the road bringing it into alignment.

Become one with yourself.

Why do I tell you this? Was I scared? You bet! I talk about this because becoming one with whatever is causing anxiety, alarm or discomfort is when you take back your power. Being one with yourself is akin to not only listening to but also hearing your voice, your intuition. Hearing the message that will allow you to carry forward through whatever is distressing you.

After you are one with yourself, then become one with the other. Now, the other can be another person, an idea or a situation. I became one with the situation caused by the black ice. It happened in a split second. Becoming one with “it” means you need to respect, not agree or approve, with “it.” You seek a way to bring about favorable change or outcome.

For instance, if you are having a bad argument with your lover, become one with him or her, the words he or she is using, and the idea he or she is stating. This brings about a different approach to listening or relating. It will change the outcome simply because you decided to influence it by becoming one with it. The argument is no longer an argument to win but to understand. Not a discussion to force but a conversation to express.

Influence through your inner fluency – your intuition.

When you have pain, emotional or physical, connect with it – become one with it. Use your internal energy to be it. We’ve all read where people have survived enormous hardship by being in concert with it. Be aware of what is in your control while allowing your energy, emotions and being to join with the pain, thereby knowing what is needed to overcome or change it.

Out of this comes your greatest asset – using your intuition, power and favor with becoming one with whatever is there. You can do it – you may already do it but not know it. Bring it fully into your consciousness. Surrender to your natural ability to influence through your intuition or “inner fluency.”

Great! Now what? How am I supposed to just turn on my intuition? Easier said than done!

These are all things I hear from people. They are frustrated because a society has effectively devalued their intuition and confidence in using it. I say use it. Use it when you need it. Use it every minute you are awake. How?

It all starts with your soul. Listen to the messages that are there. If you can’t hear them then ask, I need to know – - – . You will get a response. But you need to recognize the response, particularly if it isn’t one you were expecting. Trust me – I have had that happen often enough!

Next, find the meaning in the message. Meaning is the value you place on the message, the appreciation for it, and your acceptance that it’s there and it’s for you. Sometimes it’s easier to force our interpretation on this message so we get what we want. But that isn’t always the wisest thing to do.

You have three choices when it comes to listening to the messages of your soul. One, ignore it. Two, negotiate with it. And, three, accept it.

When you have decided how you will receive your message, then you allow your mind to become one with it. Does it make sense to you? Is it in alignment with your core values? Will it express who you really are – not what someone else wants you to be? These are only a few questions that you need to answer in allowing your soul’s message to join with your mind.

Lastly, you decide how, when and where you will express this message. This is the outward part of influence. Influence never starts beyond you; it always begins within you.

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